CONAN: " I WOULD NEVER HAVE DONE WHAT JAY LENO DID TO ME"

If the tables had been turned during their late-night dispute, Conan O'Brien says he knows what he would – and wouldn't – have done to Jay Leno. "He went and took that show back and I think in a similar situation, if roles had been reversed, I know – I know me, I wouldn't have done that," O'Brien, 47, says in his first post-Tonight Show interview, scheduled to air on 60 Minutes Sunday. In the interview, the new TBS late-night host tells Steve Kroft that he would not have "surrendered The Tonight Show and handed it over to somebody publicly and wished them well – and then … six months later… But that's me, you know." Adding that "Everyone's got their own, you know, way of doing things," O'Brien, who's been on the road for his 30-date North American tour, says if he had been in Leno's shoes, he would've "done something else, go someplace else."Leaving NBC, he says, was like severing a "toxic" relationship, especially one he didn't see having a future with. And though he may negotiated with the network, O'Brien says he "started to feel that I'm not sure these people even really want me here."

JUST LIKE I THOUGHT, THE NEW "NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET" IS A NIGHTMARE ALRIGHT

The studio optimist who wrote the official press notes for "A Nightmare on Elm Street" describes Freddy Krueger's latest appearance as "a reinvention of the seminal 1984 horror classic." In reality, it's more like a bludgeoning.
The fan anxiety over Jackie Earle Haley replacing Robert Englund turns out to be warranted: Haley's a fine actor, but he was far scarier in the suburban drama "Little Children." And Englund's unpredictable presence is definitely missed.
Don't blame Haley, though. Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer's screenplay goes in the wrong direction entirely, dropping Freddy's sick sense of humor while turning him into a generic bogeyman.
Novice director Samuel Bayer returns to the initial Elm Street crime scene, where high-school senior Nancy (Rooney Mara) is being stalked by Freddy in her dreams. Other students (including "Twilight's" Kellan Lutz) are also tortured when they fall asleep, though no one knows why.
With help from her mom (Connie Britton) and boyfriend (Kyle Gallner), Nancy learns that Freddy was once a pedophile preying on preschoolers. She and her friends were his final victims, before their enraged parents set him on fire. Years later, he's returned for revenge.
When he kills someone in her sleep, she dies in reality, so Nancy's only hope is to stay awake. But all the Red Bull in the world won't keep her and her friends up forever.
If all you're looking for are cheap scares, you'll find a few minor jolts and a decent - though not interesting or unusual - amount of gore. But be warned: You may need your own case of Red Bull just to make it all the way through.

BARE CHESTED "JAKE" TEARS UP AFTER GETTIN THE BOOT ON DWTS

Highlights from this season's "Dancing with the Stars" include Maksim Chmerkovskiy baring his chest and Jake Pavelka going pantless for "Risky Business" as Pam Anderson continues to sex up the floor.When former Bachelor Jake Pavelka was eliminated from "Dancing With the Stars" Tuesday night, he thanked Texas, the Mavericks and all of Canada. Oh, and "the tweets and Facebooks." Jake also cried during his good-bye speech. America had essentially told him he wasn't getting their rose.

LATEST ON "THE CHELSEA HANDLER SEX TAPE"

No joke! Chelsea Handler confirms homemade sex tape was sent out as audition video to casting agents.

iF there's one thing Chelsea Handler knows, it's how to get someone's attention.Before finding success as an author and late night host of E!'s "Chelsea Lately," Handler starred in a homemade sex tape that she claims is a joke.The graphic tape, obtained by RadarOnline.com, was made over a decade ago after Handler moved to Los Angeles. The video is said to begin with Handler wearing a work uniform and introducing herself to the camera by name before launching into a stand-up routine. The tape abruptly cuts to a scene in which Handler and a male companion with a British accent are engaging in an explicit sex act, according to Radar.Handler is described as being fully naked during the racy scene, and at several moments she looks directly at the camera.The tape then immediately cuts back to Handler's original stand-up routine in what is presumably her apartment.Handler's rep confirmed the authenticity of the video, saying, "The tape you have is an old tape that was done for a stand up comedy bit."Handler, 35, took matters into her own hands on her talk show Wednesday night by addressing the "sexy time tape" she made when she was 23. "I would like to say to Radar Online, thanks for ruining my surprise Christmas gift to my staff," Handler joked. "Number two, it was made as a joke. I put it on an audition tape for a comedy club, because I'm a comedienne, and I've been showing it at birthday parties for f---ing years!"According to Radar, Handler sent the video tapes to Hollywood agents as a demo tape when she was looking for work. "This is an old demo tape that Chelsea had put together just a couple years after moving out to Hollywood when she was trying to make it as a comedienne," a source said. "It was taken so long ago and distributed on old VHS tapes, that I'm sure most people just threw them out because her stand-up was so bad and they didn't realize she would make it big one day. It's highly possible that many of the recipients of the tape didn't even watch past the first couple of minutes and missed the sex tape part altogether.