JUST LIKE I THOUGHT, THE NEW "NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET" IS A NIGHTMARE ALRIGHT

The studio optimist who wrote the official press notes for "A Nightmare on Elm Street" describes Freddy Krueger's latest appearance as "a reinvention of the seminal 1984 horror classic." In reality, it's more like a bludgeoning.
The fan anxiety over Jackie Earle Haley replacing Robert Englund turns out to be warranted: Haley's a fine actor, but he was far scarier in the suburban drama "Little Children." And Englund's unpredictable presence is definitely missed.
Don't blame Haley, though. Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer's screenplay goes in the wrong direction entirely, dropping Freddy's sick sense of humor while turning him into a generic bogeyman.
Novice director Samuel Bayer returns to the initial Elm Street crime scene, where high-school senior Nancy (Rooney Mara) is being stalked by Freddy in her dreams. Other students (including "Twilight's" Kellan Lutz) are also tortured when they fall asleep, though no one knows why.
With help from her mom (Connie Britton) and boyfriend (Kyle Gallner), Nancy learns that Freddy was once a pedophile preying on preschoolers. She and her friends were his final victims, before their enraged parents set him on fire. Years later, he's returned for revenge.
When he kills someone in her sleep, she dies in reality, so Nancy's only hope is to stay awake. But all the Red Bull in the world won't keep her and her friends up forever.
If all you're looking for are cheap scares, you'll find a few minor jolts and a decent - though not interesting or unusual - amount of gore. But be warned: You may need your own case of Red Bull just to make it all the way through.